Bittersweet Good-bye
There are days when I wake up and wonder why things happen the way they do. Many times, I scratch my head regarding certain thoughts, decisions and outcomes. While there have been some regrets as in “If only I had ____,” there is absolutely no doubt what the most important calling has been in my life - Motherhood .
For more than 25 years I have been a mother and I will absolutely be a mother until the day I die. It won’t always be as primary as it has been these last 25 years, but it will always be a critical piece of who I am. I see it as a blessing, an honor and a joy that I celebrate each and every day.
I was reminded once again this weekend how blessed and honored I am as I watched my youngest daughter receive her high school diploma. It was bittersweet. A good-bye to her public school career and to my last time-sharing in the celebration of this important milestone. To date, she and I have traveled an amazing road. We have weathered many storms – the usual trials and tribulations. There have been broken hearts, disappointments and misunderstandings throughout the years. All part of the growing pains intertwined with childhood, puberty and adolescence.
Having two others go before her, I prepared myself for this occasion. Did I say bittersweet? I think so. While I watched her take her steps across the stage, I felt great pride, a sense of accomplishment and some regret.
I am certainly proud of her and her many accomplishments. My regrets are just that — my regrets. Like any parent, I believe there are those times when you wish a “do over” would be possible. I can certainly think of a few. All things considered; the good times and the bad, she and I made it through with flying colors.
In this time and place, I wonder what I will do when she is gone? She is ready to begin to live her life without me in the day-to-day. While I celebrate her independence, and her new life, I know this is a catalyst for change in my life.
My baby, my last — a very big deal for me. Now I will be on a new path. A path that places me at the forefront. Make no mistake, my children will always have my attention, but their needs will be different. We have reached a new plateau.
For me, I am excited about my path. It has already started to take on new directions. New interests have been developing and some past loves reignited. Each one bringing something new and exciting to my life.
I applaud the accomplishments of my daughter. She hung in at a time when things were a bit tough. She grew, she learned and she overcame obstacles that for many would have been crippling. Yesterday, her graduation day, was a bittersweet good-bye. It was a good-bye to her childhood, her insecurities, and some of the critical supports that brought her to where she is today. She persevered, she worked hard, and she succeeded!
So today, it is with great pride and much love, I wish her a future of joy, hope and excitement. No one is more deserving. Congratulations to my baby!!
